Ok, just now, everything returned to normal. Typing doesn't slow comp down, right clicking doesnt crash explorer.
I have done NOTHING to change anything since I made my last post-not even a reboot.
Gooooood is this strange. I don't expect this to last, I'm assuming it'll revert back either after I reboot or sooner. If it does revert after I reboot, I'll know that's the problem.
And thanks for the suggestion Nick, but if you'll look back through the thread you'll see I already said that the HP machine comes with the system repair function already built in

(I've used it twice before, so I know the deal)
I'm going to wait for my tech genius to take a look at it first hand before I do anything drastic. Thanks for all your help, any more input would still be appreciated.