Standing orders to all airship captains. (Top Priority - Top Secret)
The government has anticipated attack on airships by hostile flying machines. The boffins have come up with a solution covering all eventualities. The airship manufacturer has arranged for a supply of the latest weapon from Messrs. Colt's Patent Fire Arms Mfg. Co, armament supplier to no less a personage than the President of the US of A. See illustration below.
These advanced rapid-firing weapons will be fitted to all airships immediately, if not sooner. The weapons are hand operated to avoid being affected by severe icing in low temperatures. (Nothing has been left to chance.) The aforementioned weapons will be located on various hidden swivel mountings well away from the cunningly placed targets on the exterior of the airship & positioned to cover all angles of possible attack. The targets themselves will be painted over areas subject to the least damage when hit & well away from gasbags & other vital equipment. These targets will distract the attention of attacking pilots long enough for the highly trained gunners to take aim & dispatch them. The instigator of this ingenious & cunning plan is Air Gunner (3rd class) Baldrick of the 13th Platoon, 44th Cookhouse Regiment (Submarine Division).
In the event of the aforementioned airship being attacked by a multitude of flying machines in sufficient quantity greater than the amount of defensive guns fitted there is an emergency plan, hereinafter referred to as Plan B.
Plan B.
The captain will order all available ballast to be jettisoned. If sufficient ballast is not available, the aforementioned captain will persuade the more misguided crew members to leap overboard (with or without parachutes) for the sake of their king & country & the ship, including more important crew members & the captain himself. These can include the gunners & their weapons as they have no further part to play in the proceedings. The airship thus being lightened will climb to a safe altitude faster than any fixed wing flying machine in service.
by fido » Thu Dec 04, 2003 4:56 pm 
