The Famous Small Garden Animals of History Debate

[Smoke2much]

There you go Doug.

[Hagar]

Errm - thanks Will - I think. ::)

Not sure where to start. I have all sorts of animals in my garden. They seem to like it as it resembles a tropical jungle most of the time. One unwelcome visitor is an urban fox that seems to regard my garden as its own property. Actually I suspect it's a vixen as it doesn't seem to do my lawn any good. I like animals & wish them no harm but I would dearly love to get rid of it. To be honest if I had a gun I would shoot the blasted thing. Foxes don't belong in built-up areas, let alone my back garden.

PS. I suppose this could be loosely described as Natural History so this is the best place for it.

[ozzy72]

Over here we get lots of deer in the vineyard. One of my friends had an unfortunate encounter with a wild boar which left him with a broken leg.
With the flat the only visitors we get are ruddy pigeons. I've just remembered to get the air pistol out of the cupboard! I HATE flying rats

[Hagar]

All suggestions on removing unwelcome urban foxes from Hagar's back garden gratefully received. I'm not a violent person & would prefer to do this without loss of life. Also the least mess involved the better. I just don't want the blasted thing on my property. So far it's ignored all notices to that effect. "Hagar's Property - Foxes Keep Out..........!" Not only can it not read it seems to be oblivious to subtle hints like me hurling anything to hand at it. I've lost several shoes in this way & I'm running out of ammo.

PS. Sensible suggestions only please. I'm perfectly capable of thinking up silly ones myself.

[Craig.]

Doug, a small bb gun might work. They dont have enough power to kill it, and they use small plastic pellets as ammo these days so it wont even do any damage. It should be enough of a sting that it gets it to leave and after a few encounters it should learn to stay away. the other thing is automatic lights, with the sensor, i dont know if you already have one but we found this to work in getting rid of hedgehogs that we used to get in the garden. Not that we had a problem with them, but our dog loves to play with animals but he tended to bark at them and scare them silly so it was better to have them run off.

[Woodlouse2002]

Automatic lights would only be a temporary solution. The Fox would soon pluck up the courage to return. I suspect the same with the BB gun. I think you can get little ultrasound trasmitters that you can put in your garden to keep foxes, dogs and cats away. Failing that I've heard they don't like the smell of diesel....

[Hagar]

Thanks for the suggestions chaps. It sits & pulls faces at me but I don't think it will stay still long enough for me to hit it with a BB gun. I don't like the idea of flooding my garden with DERV so that leaves the electronic route. I've been thinking of trying one of those ultrasound gizmos so this has made up my mind. I'll get one ASAP & report back later.

Amazing the things you can get help on here.

[ozzy72]

There are websites that show you how to make your own flamethrowers Doug, you could have a little barbie

[Hagar]

There are websites that show you how to make your own flamethrowers Doug, you could have a little barbie

Thanks Mark but I've heard of people burning their houses down doing things like that, especially if the back garden is flooded with DERV. Way too risky. I'd rather leave the bloomin' fox alone.

[C]

There are websites that show you how to make your own flamethrowers Doug, you could have a little barbie

...or you could get a hound or two - I'm not sure if its illegal if its in your back garden though...

I've never thought if I have foxes in our back garden - it could be what makes the rabbits thump at night, although we think that's cats...

[Hagar]

...or you could get a hound or two - I'm not sure if its illegal if its in your back garden though...

I have enough problems with the bloomin' fox. I don't want hounds or any more 4-legged critters. I'm tryin' to get rid of 'em not start a menagerie.

I've never thought if I have foxes in our back garden - it could be what makes the rabbits thump at night, although we think that's cats...

Not sure rabbits are too worried about cats. Maybe you'd better get tooled up just in case. Order an air strike by some of your mates. This is getting serious.

PS. That AAC lieutenant (if he's still a lieutenant) could come & hurl pizzas at it.

[Woodlouse2002]

Actually, if you want a fool proof method then get yourself a Llama. They're very territorial and will keep the fox away with out fail. Some farmers use them to protect sheep and lambs from foxes and other preditors.

[Hagar]

Llamas now is it? Have you seen the size of them things? Not very good-tempered either. They like spitting at you when you least expect it. That's not very nice. While I'm about it why don't I get an elephant & done with? They could all become jolly good friends & live happily ever afterwards with the fox & its complete family in my back garden while poor Hagar is forced out of his beloved home for keeping an illegal zoo.

[ozzy72]

How about wearing a big red jacket (I'm sure you can mug a Chelsea Pensioner ) and playing with an instrument from the brass section of a band?

[C]

PS. That AAC lieutenant (if he's still a lieutenant) could come & hurl pizzas at it.

I say make the bugger a General... (at least then he'd be on a par with an RAF Squadron Leader...)

Charlie

(no offence to any Army types, and I'm sure you've all heard the one about the RAF Flt Sgt and the Army Major... )