Corn

[Ang2dogs]

(courtesy of an 8 yr old trick-or-treater last night)

Do you know why the Chicago Cubs don't use the Internet?

Because they can't put three W's in a row.

I'm an ol Yankees fan, but I do love the Cubbies.

[patchz]

I thought my girl friend was wearing a push [glow=yellow,2,300]down[/glow] bra, but found out she wasn't wearing any bra.

[Steve M]

I thought my girl friend was wearing a push [glow=yellow,2,300]down[/glow] bra, but found out she wasn't wearing any bra.

Somehow nipples in your oatmeal came up in a conversation I had earlier this week. 

[CHUCK79]

Susie and Candy (both blonde) work in a lightbulb factory.......one day Susie says "I've been looking at lightbulbs for so long that I think I'm becoming one!" just then the foreman walks by and happens to overhear her. He says "Susie, you should take the rest of the day off".  Susie agrees and heads for the door. Candy starts after her....the foreman says "where are you going Candy?" "You don't expect me to work in the dark do you?" was the reply

[patchz]

[quote]Susie and Candy (both blonde) work in a lightbulb factory.......one day Susie says "I've been looking at lightbulbs for so long that I think I'm becoming one!" just then the foreman walks by and happens to overhear her. He says "Susie, you should take the rest of the day off".

[FSX_Dude]

[quote][quote]Susie and Candy (both blonde) work in a lightbulb factory.......one day Susie says "I've been looking at lightbulbs for so long that I think I'm becoming one!" just then the foreman walks by and happens to overhear her. He says "Susie, you should take the rest of the day off".

[Bud Greene]

What did the leper say to the prostitute?
Keep the tip.

[Steve M]

It's sad how Wile E. Coyote is remembered for his violence, and not for his brilliantly realistic paintings of tunnels.

[FSX_Dude]

It's sad how Wile E. Coyote is remembered for his violence, and not for his brilliantly realistic paintings of tunnels.

[patchz]

I think it's sad that Wile is just not remembered more. And the fact that he never won. Just once, I would have liked to see him win and play Colonel Sanders with that bird.

[patchz]

What does a six hundred pound canary say?

[U4EA]

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.

After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.

She says, 'What's the story?'

He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor'

She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'

[FSX_Dude]

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.

After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.

She says, 'What's the story?'

He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor'

She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'

I had to read that a few times to get it.

[Steve M]

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.

After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.

She says, 'What's the story?'

He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor'

She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'

Sweet!

[Steve M]

It seems a farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon load of corn. The
farmer who lived nearby heard the noise.
"Hey Willis!!" the farmer yelled. "Forget your troubles. Come in with us.
Then I'll help you get the wagon up."
"That's mighty nice of you, " Willis answered, "but I don't think Pa would
like me to."
"Aw, come on," the farmer insisted.
"Well okay," the boy finally agreed, and added, "But Pa won't like it."
After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. "I feel a lot better now,
but I know Pa is going to be real upset."
"Don't be foolish !" the neighbor said with a smile. "By the way, where is
he?"
"Under the wagon."