"Hello," said Father O'Malley after lifting the receiver, "this is Father O'Malley."
"This is the IRS. Would you please help us?"
"I will if I can."
"Do you know a Thomas Houlihan?"
"I do."
"Is he a member of your congregation?"
"He is."
"Did he donate $10,000 to the church?"
"He will."
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Doggone well-Received Donation
One day his dog, the lone friend Muldoon had in his lonely countryside home, died. Muldoon made the sad trip to the parish priest, "Father, me dog is dead. Could ya be sayin' a mass fer the poor creature?"
Father Patrick replied, "I'm afraid I cannot have services for an animal in the church. There are some Baptists down the lane, though, and there's no tellin' what they believe. Maybe they'll do something for your departed creature."
"I'll go to them right away, Father," Muldoon replied, "Do ya think $5,000 is enough to donate to them for the service?"
"Sweet Mary!" Father Patrick exclaimed, "Why did ya not tell me the dog was a Catholic?"
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('tis but a couple edited reposts -- Cheers, all

