Dead parrot

What are you laughing at?

Dead parrot

Postby OldAirmail » Sun Jul 12, 2015 2:09 pm

A woman brought a very limp parrot into a veterinary hospital.

As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, Polly has passed away."

The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure? I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something. "


The vet rolled his eyes, shrugged, turned and left the room, returning a few moments later with a beautiful black Labrador.

As the bird's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the dead parrot from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.


The vet led the dog out but returned a few moments later with a cat.

The cat jumped up and also sniffed delicately at the ex-bird. The cat sat back, shook its head, meowed and ran out of the room.


The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but like I said, your parrot is most definitely, 100%, certifiably . . . dead. "

He then turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill which he handed to the woman.


The parrot's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried. "$150 just to tell me my bird is dead!"

The vet shrugged. "If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would only have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan. . . . . . . What did you expect??"
.. .
Get the most out of your controls - SPAD.neXt

Image
. . . . . .Any time, any plane, any weather.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . Prepar3d V4
User avatar
OldAirmail
Major
Major
 
Posts: 4814
Joined: Sun Feb 17, 2013 3:06 pm
Location: Concrete, WA ICAO - 3W5

Re: Dead parrot

Postby Webb » Sun Jul 12, 2015 3:17 pm

I guess that rules out any chance he was just pining for the fjords.
"Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!" - Sen. John Blutarsky

You know, this used to be a helluva good country. I don't understand what's gone wrong with it. - George Hanson, 1969

A bad day at golf is better than a good day at work.


Image

Jim
User avatar
Webb
Major
Major
 
Posts: 2236
Joined: Sat Sep 25, 2010 4:45 pm
Location: KBCT

Re: Dead parrot

Postby Anthindelahunt » Sun Jul 12, 2015 10:54 pm

You have done it again. :lol:
You keep finding these gems.

Thanks for the laugh OAM.

Anthin. :lol:
User avatar
Anthindelahunt
Major
Major
 
Posts: 1507
Joined: Tue Sep 28, 2010 5:02 pm
Location: Canberra Australia

Re: Dead parrot

Postby Hawkeye07 » Mon Jul 13, 2015 12:38 am

:lol: :lol: :lol: That made my day. Thanks OAM!
Image

An Aircraft Mechanic only needs two tools, Duct Tape and WD40.
If it moves and it's not supposed to - use the Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move and it's supposed to - use the WD40.

Intel(R) i5 CPU 750 @ 2.67GHz, P55M-UD4, GeForce GTX960 8.00 GB RAM, Windows 7 Ultimate (32 bit & 64 bit on separate HDs)
User avatar
Hawkeye07
Major
Major
 
Posts: 1275
Joined: Sun Dec 02, 2012 7:10 pm
Location: Landlocked in the Midwest USA at KAXN


Return to Humour

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 428 guests