Did it again...

If it doesn't fit .. It fits here .. - -

Did it again...

Postby Flying Trucker » Tue Jul 07, 2015 6:56 am

Goodly morning all... :dance:

As most of you know the Old Girl goes to Church every Sunday to get saved...rain, snow, sleet and hail...she goes...

Now mind you I do go for Easter, Thanksgiving, Remembrance Day, Christmas, something to do with the family like a Christening and if I know they are going to have real good salmon sandwiches... :pray:

So I tried to help the Old Girl out and now I shall be standing in the corner of the underground parking in my wee little shed for a day or two...don't figure... :liar: :shifty: :doh:


Subject: Church Ladies With Typewriters -
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
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Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
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The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.'
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Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
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Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
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Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
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For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
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Next Thursday there will be try-outs for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
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Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
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A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
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At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.
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Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
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Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered..
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The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
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Pot-luck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
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The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
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This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
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The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
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Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM . Please use the back door.
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The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM .. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
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Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
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And this one just about sums them all up
The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last Sunday:
'I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.'

Wish me luck folks... :violin: :whistle:
Cheers...Happy Landings...Doug
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Re: Did it again...

Postby Fozzer » Tue Jul 07, 2015 9:48 am

Wonderful, Doug.... :D ..!

...every one a winner!... :lol: ...!

I don't think that we English folk are much into "Churches" nowadays, so its always a breath of fresh air to know that we are not the only ones!

We built Stonehenge, instead... ;) ....

"Praying" never did us any good... :lol: ...!

Paul..."Here endeth the first lesson".... :lol: ... :lol: ...!
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Re: Did it again...

Postby Hagar » Tue Jul 07, 2015 10:23 am

Every one a classic! :clap: :dance:

Good luck with the Old Girl. :pray:
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Re: Did it again...

Postby Shadowcaster » Tue Jul 07, 2015 11:06 am

Brilliant, really cheered me up thanks. :dance: :dance: :clap: :clap: :lol: :lol: :lol:
All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

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Re: Did it again...

Postby Flying Trucker » Tue Jul 07, 2015 3:19 pm

Thanks for the replies folks...much appreciated... ;)
Cheers...Happy Landings...Doug
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Re: Did it again...

Postby Steve M » Tue Jul 07, 2015 4:05 pm

Nice one Doug! Made me smile. :clap:
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Re: Did it again...

Postby Anthindelahunt » Tue Jul 07, 2015 5:50 pm

Thanks Doug.that cheered me up on this cold
wednesday morning.

Anthin. :lol:
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Re: Did it again...

Postby OldAirmail » Tue Jul 07, 2015 6:45 pm

Non-stop laughter. :clap:
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Re: Did it again...

Postby Anthindelahunt » Tue Jul 07, 2015 7:31 pm

Just goes to prove that SimV is a nuthouse.I would
not have it any other way. :lol:

Anthin.Still laughing. :lol:
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Re: Did it again...

Postby Hawkeye07 » Tue Jul 07, 2015 11:01 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: Very good Doug! Maybe this one should be pinned and retitled "When you're feeling down or in bad humor --->READ THIS POST"
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Re: Did it again...

Postby Flying Trucker » Wed Jul 08, 2015 5:45 am

Thanks for the replies folks...much appreciated...the Old Girl is letting me out from standing in the corner of my wee little shed in the underground parking but only if I behave myself and take her out for supper... :dance: :think:
Cheers...Happy Landings...Doug
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Re: Did it again...

Postby Hawkeye07 » Wed Jul 08, 2015 3:21 pm

Flying Trucker wrote:Thanks for the replies folks...much appreciated...the Old Girl is letting me out from standing in the corner of my wee little shed in the underground parking but only if I behave myself and take her out for supper... :dance: :think:



DON'T MAKE HER PAY FOR SUPPER!!!! :lol:
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If it moves and it's not supposed to - use the Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move and it's supposed to - use the WD40.

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Re: Did it again...

Postby Flying Trucker » Thu Jul 09, 2015 7:19 am

Now you tell me Hawkeye07... :doh: :lol:
Cheers...Happy Landings...Doug
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