If you pretend to be blind, your dog can stay in your motel room free of charge.
The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.
Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
People think fat dogs are cute.
A dog will let you put a studded leather collar on it without calling you a pervert.
Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
A dog won't hold out on you to get a new car.
If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad ... they just find it interesting.
Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
On a car trip, your dog never insists on running the heater.
A dog's disposition stays the same all month.
It's legal to keep a dog chained up at your house.
A dog's parents never visit.
Dogs do not hate their bodies.
No dog ever put on a hundred pounds after reaching adulthood.
Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.
Dogs agree; to get your point across, you have to raise your voice.
Dogs like to ride in the back of pickup trucks.
Dogs like to do their snooping outside, rather than in your wallet or desk
Dogs are not allowed in Bloomingdale's or Neiman Marcus.
If a dog leaves you, it won't try to take half your stuff.
Dogs can't talk.
Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.
You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.
Dogs like to go hunting.
Another man will seldom steal your dog.
If you bring another dog home, your dog will happily play with both of you at the same time.
A dog will not wake you up at night and ask you, "If l died, would you get another dog?"