Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

If it doesn't fit .. It fits here .. - -

Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

Postby RitterKreuz » Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:16 pm

Has anyone else received this forwarded e-mail which asks the following questions?

Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
Every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway?

If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out!"

Who was the first person to look at an egg come out of a chickens ass and say "That looks like some good eatin!"?

Why do toasters always have a setting that turns the toast into a charcoal briquette , which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

When your photo is taken for your driver's license, why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by the police and asked for your license, are you going to be smiling?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

What do you call male ballerinas?

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?

If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
RitterKreuz
Major
Major
 
Posts: 1215
Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2003 3:26 am
Location: Texas

Re: Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

Postby RitterKreuz » Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:16 pm

Here are the answers to the questions as provided by someone who was obviously sick of receiving this junk e-mail three times a day  ;D ;D ;D

1. Yes, your tear glands can produce tears however you cannot breathe to
Last edited by RitterKreuz on Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.
RitterKreuz
Major
Major
 
Posts: 1215
Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2003 3:26 am
Location: Texas

Re: Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

Postby RitterKreuz » Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:17 pm

11. Yes,
RitterKreuz
Major
Major
 
Posts: 1215
Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2003 3:26 am
Location: Texas

Re: Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

Postby RitterKreuz » Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:17 pm

18. Bra is not singular, it is short for "Brassiere" which is French in origin therefore it is not an English word and is not subject to the same
Last edited by RitterKreuz on Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.
RitterKreuz
Major
Major
 
Posts: 1215
Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2003 3:26 am
Location: Texas

Re: Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

Postby RitterKreuz » Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:28 pm

32. This is the reason his name is "Wyle E. Coyote". In early versions of the cartoon the coyote uses the name
RitterKreuz
Major
Major
 
Posts: 1215
Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2003 3:26 am
Location: Texas

Re: Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

Postby MWISimmer » Fri Apr 20, 2007 4:45 pm

Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

At current exchange rates, both are one and the same...
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
Every two hours?

Same with "I slept like a log".. meaning I woke up in the fireplace.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

It doesn't matter in the bedroom, they're both plurals, as in "Get 'em off"
MWISimmer
 

Re: Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

Postby RitterKreuz » Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:45 pm

nice  ;)

giggidy giggidy
RitterKreuz
Major
Major
 
Posts: 1215
Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2003 3:26 am
Location: Texas

Re: Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

Postby DONTREADMYUSERNAME » Fri Apr 20, 2007 9:37 pm

hmmm........number 36.......... lets see..........


Twinkle, twinkle little star, how i..............


Yup they do
We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police.
-- Jeff Marder

Stupid Sox Fans
Image

Image
DONTREADMYUSERNAME
Captain
Captain
 
Posts: 699
Joined: Wed Dec 20, 2006 5:00 pm

Re: Forwarded Email With Dumb Questions

Postby TacitBlue » Sun Apr 22, 2007 5:01 pm

#37 has always bothered me. When I was in school this stupid joke would come up once in a while, and I would always explain that a hemisphere is half of a sphere, or ball. So an asteroid is neither inside of it or outside of it as it doesn't refer to any specific object. "western hemisphere" would be more specific, but lots of things, including half of the earth are outside of it, not just asteroids. Atmosphere might be more appropriate, but then that doesn't sound like it's related to hemorrhoids and would render the joke even less funny. This explanation was usually met with "You're stupid" ::)

...Yep, I'm the dumb guy who knows the difference between hemisphere and atmosphere. :P
Image
A&P Mechanic, Rankin Aircraft 78Y

Aircraft are naturally beautiful because form follows function. -TB
User avatar
TacitBlue
Major
Major
 
Posts: 3856
Joined: Mon Nov 08, 2004 12:33 pm
Location: Saint Joseph, Missouri, USA


Return to General Discussion

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 465 guests