AUDI - Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
BMW - Bavarian Money Waster
CHEVROLET - Can Hear Every Valve Rattle On Long Extended Trips
DODGE - Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
FIAT - Fix It Again, Tony - or - Found in a Tip
FORD - Fixed Or Repaired Daily; (Backwards) Driver Returns On Foot - or - Found On Roadside Dead
GMC - Got a Mechanic Coming?
HONDA - Honest, Officer, Nobody Drank Anything; Had One, Never Did Again
HYUNDAI - Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive
JEEP - Journey Eventually Ends Perpendicularly - or - Just Enough Essential Parts
KIA - Korea's Incompetence Amazing
MAZDA - Mismanages A Zillion Dollars Annually
LAND ROVER - Loud, Agonizing, Noisy Drive - Rattles On Virtually Every Road
PLYMOUTH - Please Leave Your Money Out Under The Hood
PORSCHE - Pity Only Rich Snobs Can Have +Em
ROVER - Rattles On Virtually Every Road
SAAB - Send Another Automobile Back; Swedish Autos Always Breakdown
SATURN - Stickers Are Truly Unnegotiable, Rebates Nonexistent
TOYOTA - Too Often Yankees Overprice This Automobile
VW - Virtually Worthless
VOLVO - Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object
