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Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Fri Nov 28, 2008 5:20 am
by ozzy72
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one  blonde says to the other, 'Which do you think is farther away... Florida or the moon?'  
The other blonde turns and says 'Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?????'  

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.  
After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.  
She says, 'What's the story?'  
He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor'  
She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'  

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, 'I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!'  

There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. 'Yoo-hoo!' she shouts, 'How can I get to the other side?'  
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, 'You  ARE on the other side.'  

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.  
'Impossible!' says the doctor. 'Show me.'  
The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.  
The doctor said, 'You're not really a redhead, are you?  
'Well, no' she said, 'I'm actually a blonde.'  
'I thought so,' the doctor said. 'Your finger is broken.'  

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Fri Nov 28, 2008 5:45 am
by Mazza
Love them!!!!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Fri Nov 28, 2008 11:51 am
by Brando14100
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

8-)

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Fri Nov 28, 2008 11:52 am
by skoker
i've seen #2 before... ;D

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Fri Nov 28, 2008 12:50 pm
by H
i've seen #2 before... ;D
Just before flushing, perhaps?***
***Good placement to lure us into that, Ozzy
;D


8-)

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Fri Nov 28, 2008 12:55 pm
by Steve M
 ;D ;D ;D

The last one had me laughing real good!

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Fri Nov 28, 2008 10:13 pm
by BigTruck
Now these had me rolling

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Sat Nov 29, 2008 5:41 am
by Mushroom_Farmer
Sent all of those to my favorite blonde...Still awaiting a reply.  ;D ;D ;D

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Sat Nov 29, 2008 8:18 am
by Felix/FFDS
Ozzy, enjoy them while you can, because when my virtual grandaughter learns to read .....  those jokes STOP!

(or you'll be in a world of hurt!)

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Sat Nov 29, 2008 10:01 am
by T1MT1M
[quote]Ozzy, enjoy them while you can, because when my virtual grandaughter learns to read .....

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Sat Nov 29, 2008 6:41 pm
by Staiduk
Gotta be careful about telling blonde jokes nowadays though...

No kidding; I used to tell 'em all the time until the day a blonde got mad and came after me with a razor.

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Sat Nov 29, 2008 7:05 pm
by Romulus111VADT
Tell this woman some Blondie jokes and she'll open up a can of whoopass on you like you never dreamed off..... ;D
Image
Of course, if your into being physically abused or you have the need to feel like Mrs. Schwarzenegger..... ;)


:D

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Sat Nov 29, 2008 8:05 pm
by Mushroom_Farmer
Tell this woman some Blondie jokes and she'll open up a can of whoopass on you like you never dreamed off..... ;D
Image
Of course, if your into being physically abused or you have the need to feel like Mrs. Schwarzenegger..... ;)


:D

What's that growing from her(?) abdomen? :-?

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Sat Nov 29, 2008 9:58 pm
by BigTruck
Tell this woman some Blondie jokes and she'll open up a can of whoopass on you like you never dreamed off..... ;D
Image
Of course, if your into being physically abused or you have the need to feel like Mrs. Schwarzenegger..... ;)


:D

What's that growing from her(?) abdomen? :-?


That's her built in cigarette lighter

Re: Some blonde moments

PostPosted: Sat Nov 29, 2008 10:12 pm
by Brando14100
Tell this woman some Blondie jokes and she'll open up a can of whoopass on you like you never dreamed off..... ;D
Image
Of course, if your into being physically abused or you have the need to feel like Mrs. Schwarzenegger..... ;)


:D


That's just gross.

8-)