Humorous ATC
Posted: Sun Feb 11, 2007 5:25 pmMy dad emailed this to me and I though some of you might enjoy it.
Actual exchanges between pilots and control towers
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Tower:"Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!"
Delta 351:"Give us another hint! We have digital watches!"
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Tower:"TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees."
TWA 2341:"Center, we are at 35,000 feet.
How much noise can we make up here?"
Tower:"Sir, have you ever heard the noise a
747 makes when it hits a 727?"
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O'Hare Approach Control to a 747:"United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker,one o'clock,
three miles, Eastbound."
United 329:"Approach, I've always wanted to say this..
I've got the little Fokker in sight."
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A student became lost during a solo cross-country flight. While attempting to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked,
"What was your last known position?"
Student:"When I was number one for takeoff."
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A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long roll out after touching down.
San JoseTower noted:
"American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able.
If you are not able, take the Guadeloupe exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport."
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Actual exchanges between pilots and control towers
**************************************************************************************************
Tower:"Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!"
Delta 351:"Give us another hint! We have digital watches!"
**************************************************************************************************
Tower:"TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees."
TWA 2341:"Center, we are at 35,000 feet.
How much noise can we make up here?"
Tower:"Sir, have you ever heard the noise a
747 makes when it hits a 727?"
****************************************************************************************************
O'Hare Approach Control to a 747:"United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker,one o'clock,
three miles, Eastbound."
United 329:"Approach, I've always wanted to say this..
I've got the little Fokker in sight."
****************************************************************************************************
A student became lost during a solo cross-country flight. While attempting to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked,
"What was your last known position?"
Student:"When I was number one for takeoff."
***************************************************************************************************
A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long roll out after touching down.
San JoseTower noted:
"American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able.
If you are not able, take the Guadeloupe exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport."
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