Simviation Forums

"My girlfriend said to me, You know if you really loved me you wouldn't drink so much. Then I said, You know if I didn't drink so much I don't think I would really love you!"- Gary Mule-deer.

A couple of Winston Churchill's quotations, on a similar subject:

* Lady Nancy Astor: "Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea".
     Churchill: "Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it".

* Bessie Braddock: "Sir, you are drunk".
     Churchill: "And you, madam, are ugly. But in the morning, I shall be sober".

....;D...!

Paul....Hic....:-[...!

P.S. I must add this link here, because it's always worth a read....;)...>>>

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Winston_Churchill

That is pretty funny I never knew that!
Heres another one but this ones from Ron "Tater Salad" White- "When I was in New York city I when to a bar, but sanding in at the door was a big NYC boucer you know the kind that think boucing is a cool job. Well anyway he stopped my at the door and said "Take off the hat", and I said "Why", and then he said "Because gays in this area were hats", and then I said "Oh really, because the only way we can tell in Texas is if they...have their hair cut like yours. Then he just looked at me, so not wanting to get beat-up by this 300lbs guy, I took off my hat. Then awhile later I was drunk and put my hat back on and he said "Thats it your out'a here!", then I  said "Oh really, I don't think so Scooter", I was wrong. Five 300lbs boucers through me out of the bar. Then they took turns beating me up in the parking lot. A few minutes later siting on a bench with blood running down my shirt and police officer said "I going to have to give you a ticket", for what I asked, "For being drunk in public", then I said 'Hold up a minute I was drunk in a bar, they through me out it to public!". Next the police officer asked whats your name
"Ron White" I said. Then he asked if I had any nicknames, trying to be a smarta$$ I said "Tater Salad". Six years later, outside a bar in Texas, a police officer asked "Are you Ron "Tater Salad" White?", "Yup, you caught the Tater" I said.    

^^LOL! I've heard parts and pieces of that bit, but not the whole thing (someone always interupts), Thanks for posting it.

The rest of this thread was funny too.

[quote]A couple of Winston Churchill's quotations, on a similar subject:

* Lady Nancy Astor: "Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea".