You know your new to EMS when:
Posted: Thu Aug 03, 2006 3:37 amYou check the siren at the beginning of your tour because its on the checklist.
You add things to the first in bag, "just in case"...meanwhile you do 2 jobs and the bag is still ready for WWIII when your releif checks it.
You jiggle the wires to the AED to see if you can get it to charge.
You wonder what oral glucose tastes like.
You want to kick down the door when noone answers on every lifeline alert run you sent too.
You turn on the siren of the bus before its even in drive, and leave it on as you pull up to the job.
You look at a medic as if they are the end all to everything...(I had to add that, though its nice to get that from someone)
You actually want to put a nasal cannula on someone at 6 Liters.
on a slow day you still utter the words, "Man, it is really quiet around here."
Your waistband looks like Batman's.
Your partner won't let you talk on the radio after that first emergency call when no one could understand you.
You count each and every 4x4, 5x9, band-aid, NRB, N/C, and piece of equipment on the truck
when you carry in the drug box, defibrillator, and airway bag...into an "I stubbed my toe" call
when you haven't yet mastered the art of puke-dodging.
when you can't wait to shock somebody just so you can yell "Clear!"
You attempt to mark your unit Enroute and forget what truck you're on.
You ask the driver what unit you're on while you still have the Mike Keyed (see above).
You enter the ER w/ a Pt. and the staff mistakes you for Pt. family and tells you to go to the waiting room
You do it (see above)
A patient tells you they are allergic to Narcan and you document it..
Any slightest bit of a tremor is a seizure, even if the patient it telling you "I'm having a seizure, I may need Valium"
It takes you 5 minutes to 'pop' a cold pack.
You take the extra care not to get tape on a patients eyebrows....
You believe that clearing c-spine is one of the ten commandments "though shalt not clear c-spine.." and that they should all be mechanically paralyzed.
You jump into somebody else's ambulance after a call and start taking the medic's gear out to put it in order. You are politely invited to go to your own unit. (Hey, they all look alike...)
Your first call is a priority 1 transport, and as the pt is hustled into the ambulance, you are told to ferry the medic's chase car to the hospital. Afraid to touch any of the controls, you drive on down in full Christmas-tree mode.
You check individual pencil points in the MCI triage pack at the start of the shift.
You spend extra time making sure the driver of an undamaged car really doesn't want to go to the hospital.
You have to ask the patient to pop the cold pack b/c you've been trying for 10 unsuccessful minutes...
You can tap out "Jingle Bells" on the electronic air horn..
You leave the station with the shoreline still pluged into the unit.
when your first B.P. is "120 over 80"...
You have to stop and drain the vomit out the back doors and wheel well....
You can't just wipe up the mess; you need to go from the ER to the neartest fire station and use a low pressure hose to wash it out...
You look out the window of a residence when your on scene and see two rookies pulling the cot up the steep drive way, and with two more rookies running to catch up with the AED and suction unit; You then see two rookies run inside drop the gear and run back out; Followed by a cot rolling down the drive and four rookies running after it...
You know you're new to EMS when you think you can put off going to bathroom for a few minutes.
You play the sound track to Bringing Out the Dead in the rig...
You understand what this means "we are currently 82 to your 20 with a male code 1 w/ 11 and mild 18; History of 5 & 9. Possibly a 23, did experience a 30. May also be related to the 9 due to lack of humulin IM at 15:00hrs. No 31/32 with an ETA of 5...... Good olde' County EMS Codes... "To make your job easier"
you have your uniform and jump kit laid out in the back seat of your car, "just in case"
you use iv bags as water hoses around the station, until the fire guys get so annoyed they pull out the "big guns"
You add things to the first in bag, "just in case"...meanwhile you do 2 jobs and the bag is still ready for WWIII when your releif checks it.
You jiggle the wires to the AED to see if you can get it to charge.
You wonder what oral glucose tastes like.
You want to kick down the door when noone answers on every lifeline alert run you sent too.
You turn on the siren of the bus before its even in drive, and leave it on as you pull up to the job.
You look at a medic as if they are the end all to everything...(I had to add that, though its nice to get that from someone)
You actually want to put a nasal cannula on someone at 6 Liters.
on a slow day you still utter the words, "Man, it is really quiet around here."
Your waistband looks like Batman's.
Your partner won't let you talk on the radio after that first emergency call when no one could understand you.
You count each and every 4x4, 5x9, band-aid, NRB, N/C, and piece of equipment on the truck
when you carry in the drug box, defibrillator, and airway bag...into an "I stubbed my toe" call
when you haven't yet mastered the art of puke-dodging.
when you can't wait to shock somebody just so you can yell "Clear!"
You attempt to mark your unit Enroute and forget what truck you're on.
You ask the driver what unit you're on while you still have the Mike Keyed (see above).
You enter the ER w/ a Pt. and the staff mistakes you for Pt. family and tells you to go to the waiting room
You do it (see above)
A patient tells you they are allergic to Narcan and you document it..
Any slightest bit of a tremor is a seizure, even if the patient it telling you "I'm having a seizure, I may need Valium"
It takes you 5 minutes to 'pop' a cold pack.
You take the extra care not to get tape on a patients eyebrows....
You believe that clearing c-spine is one of the ten commandments "though shalt not clear c-spine.." and that they should all be mechanically paralyzed.
You jump into somebody else's ambulance after a call and start taking the medic's gear out to put it in order. You are politely invited to go to your own unit. (Hey, they all look alike...)
Your first call is a priority 1 transport, and as the pt is hustled into the ambulance, you are told to ferry the medic's chase car to the hospital. Afraid to touch any of the controls, you drive on down in full Christmas-tree mode.
You check individual pencil points in the MCI triage pack at the start of the shift.
You spend extra time making sure the driver of an undamaged car really doesn't want to go to the hospital.
You have to ask the patient to pop the cold pack b/c you've been trying for 10 unsuccessful minutes...
You can tap out "Jingle Bells" on the electronic air horn..
You leave the station with the shoreline still pluged into the unit.
when your first B.P. is "120 over 80"...
You have to stop and drain the vomit out the back doors and wheel well....
You can't just wipe up the mess; you need to go from the ER to the neartest fire station and use a low pressure hose to wash it out...
You look out the window of a residence when your on scene and see two rookies pulling the cot up the steep drive way, and with two more rookies running to catch up with the AED and suction unit; You then see two rookies run inside drop the gear and run back out; Followed by a cot rolling down the drive and four rookies running after it...
You know you're new to EMS when you think you can put off going to bathroom for a few minutes.
You play the sound track to Bringing Out the Dead in the rig...
You understand what this means "we are currently 82 to your 20 with a male code 1 w/ 11 and mild 18; History of 5 & 9. Possibly a 23, did experience a 30. May also be related to the 9 due to lack of humulin IM at 15:00hrs. No 31/32 with an ETA of 5...... Good olde' County EMS Codes... "To make your job easier"
you have your uniform and jump kit laid out in the back seat of your car, "just in case"
you use iv bags as water hoses around the station, until the fire guys get so annoyed they pull out the "big guns"