ATC Humour
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 5:34 amHere is a collection of some real life ATC calls and their responses. Very amusing!!!
http://www.schiratti.com/humour.html
http://www.schiratti.com/humour.html
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ATC Humour
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Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 5:34 amRe: ATC Humour
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 9:18 pmSome new ones on there (for me), but mostly old.
Re: ATC Humour
Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 9:56 amPilot: "Bratislava Tower, this is Oscar Oscar Kilo estabished ILS 16."
Tower: "Oscar Oscar Kilo, Guten Tag, cleared to land 16, wind calm and by the way: this is Wien Tower."
Pilot: (short break) "Bratislava Tower, Oscar Oscar Kilo passed the outer marker."
Tower: "Oscar Oscar Kilo roger, and once more: you are approaching Vienna!"
Pilot: (short break again) "Confirm, this is NOT Bratislava?"
Tower: "You can believe me, this is Vienna!
Pilot: (once again short break) "But why? We want to go to Bratislava, not to Vienna!"
Tower: "Oscar Oscar Kilo, roger. Discontinue approach, turn left and climb to 5000 feet, vectors to Bratislava."
+ the KLM vs tower one!
Re: ATC Humour
Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 11:59 amLMAO 
ATC: "N123YZ, say altitude."
N123YZ: "ALTITUDE!"
ATC: "N123YZ, say airspeed."
N123YZ: "AIRSPEED!"
ATC: "N123YZ, say cancel IFR."
N123YZ: "Eight thousand feet, one hundred fifty knots indicated."
ATC: "N123YZ, say altitude."
N123YZ: "ALTITUDE!"
ATC: "N123YZ, say airspeed."
N123YZ: "AIRSPEED!"
ATC: "N123YZ, say cancel IFR."
N123YZ: "Eight thousand feet, one hundred fifty knots indicated."
Re: ATC Humour
Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 3:58 pmLost student pilot: "Unknown airport with Cessna 150 circling overhead, identify yourself."
~
Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 10:19 pmLost student pilot: "Unknown airport with Cessna 150 circling overhead, identify yourself."
Way to shift the blame off yourself!
Re: ATC Humour
Posted: Thu Mar 23, 2006 3:36 pmController: AF123, say call sign of your wingman.
Pilot: Uh... approach, we're a single ship.
Controller: oooohhh! You have traffic!
Controller: "Air Force 53, it appears your engine has... oh... disregard, I see you've already ejected."
Pilot: Uh... approach, we're a single ship.
Controller: oooohhh! You have traffic!
Controller: "Air Force 53, it appears your engine has... oh... disregard, I see you've already ejected."
Re: ATC Humour
Posted: Thu Mar 23, 2006 3:48 pm(busy) Moncton Center: "Speedbird 169 cleared direct Chibougamau"
BAW169: "I'm sorry, sir, can you repeat that?"
CZQM: "Speedbird 169 cleared direct Yankee Mike Tango"
BAW169: "Direct Yankee Mike Tango for Speedbird 169. What was that name again?"
CZQM: "It's called Chibougamau"
BAW169: "Would you say again, please?"
CZQM: "Chibougamau. I say again, Chibougamau!"
BAW169: "Oh, how quaint. What does it mean?"
CZQM: "It's eskimo for f--- off!"
BAW169: "I'm sorry, sir, can you repeat that?"
CZQM: "Speedbird 169 cleared direct Yankee Mike Tango"
BAW169: "Direct Yankee Mike Tango for Speedbird 169. What was that name again?"
CZQM: "It's called Chibougamau"
BAW169: "Would you say again, please?"
CZQM: "Chibougamau. I say again, Chibougamau!"
BAW169: "Oh, how quaint. What does it mean?"
CZQM: "It's eskimo for f--- off!"
Re: ATC Humour
Posted: Fri Mar 24, 2006 3:13 amATC: Pan Am 1, descend to 3,000 ft on QNH 1019.
Pan AM 1: Could you give that to me in inches?
ATC: Pan Am 1, descend to 36,000 inches on QNH 1019
Re: ATC Humour
Posted: Fri Apr 21, 2006 9:25 amvery amusing
Re: ATC Humour
Posted: Fri Apr 21, 2006 8:18 pmTower: "Delta Zulu Romeo, turn right now and report your heading."
Pilot: "Wilco. 341, 342, 343, 344, 345..."
Re: ATC Humour
Posted: Fri Apr 21, 2006 9:17 pmCessna 152: "Flight Level Three Thousand, Seven Hundred"
Controller: "Roger, contact Houston Space Center"
I like that one.