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Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Wed Nov 09, 2005 8:55 pm
by flyboy 28
The Navy found they had too many officers and decided to offer an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who volunteered for early retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The officers got to choose what those two points would be.

The first officer who accepted, asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000.

The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked out with $96,000.

The third one was a grizzly old Captain who, when asked where he would like to be measured replied, "From the tip of my penis to my testicles." It was suggested by the pension man that he may want to reconsider, explaining about the nice checks the previous two officers had received. But the old Captain insisted and they decided to go along with him, providing the measurement was taken by a medical officer.

The medical officer arrived and instructed the Captain to "drop em", which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Captain's penis and began to work back. "My God!" he suddenly exclaimed, "Where are your testicles?" The Captain calmly replied..."In Vietnam."

No offense intended, Romulus. ;)

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Wed Nov 09, 2005 11:26 pm
by Moach
LOL didn't see THAT coming ;D ;D ;D ;D

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Wed Nov 09, 2005 11:37 pm
by BFMF
;D

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Thu Nov 10, 2005 12:53 am
by ozzy72
An economically sound accident ;D

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Thu Nov 10, 2005 2:23 am
by GeForce
LOL!! ;D

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Thu Nov 10, 2005 8:30 am
by Romulus111VADT
No offense intended, Romulus. ;)


None taken.... ;D

Good joke..... ;D

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Thu Nov 10, 2005 5:06 pm
by Sytse
ouch... ;D

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Thu Nov 10, 2005 5:19 pm
by Jared
poor fella :( :-/

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2005 12:42 am
by H
Well, he's not so poor, anymore! ::)

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2005 3:04 am
by beefhole
great! ;D

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2005 3:38 am
by H
:-[personally embarassing thought but...
You rarely have a gold mine without shaft. :-X
I need to go hide
:-[

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2005 9:48 am
by legoalex2000
wow, unexpected! and original! ;D ;D ;D

nice one james!

:)ramos

Re: Nice payoff!

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2005 11:00 am
by Hai Perso Coyone?
Great one ;D