One day a drunk nationalistic tourist was stumbling along the road while on holiday in the US when he lost his balance and fell over.
A bubbly middle aged woman runs up and says, Mearn, ah you'ky?
The man rises to his feet and enraged clutches his bottle of Scotland's Finest Whiskey and in broad Scotch shouts, "I'm noot from the UK, I'm frume Scootlund"!

I don't know where you'd find a woman enunciating "Mearn, ah you'ky" unless US is an abbreviation for Upper Scotland!
Unfortunately for you, it reminds me of a tiny story I made up a long time ago:
In the early days of aviation, when aeroplanes were rarely seen, an aviator got lost in fog and clouds while flying his open air machine. His fuel near gone, the plane began to sputter when the fog began to lift. Then the sky became calm and clear as his engine completely quit. All he could do was let it glide and look for a place to land. As luck would have, ahead he saw a field and a man waving with his hand.
As his craft silently passed over the man below, the aviator yelled down, "Hey, where am I?"
"You're up!" the man yelled in jest, looking into the sky.
The aviator didn't get the joke, he thought the answer cruel,
"Exactly where?" he screamed, "I know I'm in Europe, you bloody fool!"
Don't blame me, Saitek, you started it! 