Funny Newspaper Headlines

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Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby ChrisM » Thu Apr 07, 2005 1:56 am

These are some some funny ones i found a while ago, enjoy.


SOMETHING WENT WRONG IN JET CRASH, EXPERT SAYS

POLICE BEGIN CAMAIGN TO RUN DOWN JAYWALKERS

DRUNK GETS NINE MONTHS IN VIOLIN CASE

IRAQI HEAD SEEKS ARMS

IS THERE A RING OF DEBRIS AROUND URANAS

PANDA MATING FAILS; VETERINARIAN TAKES OVER

INCLUDE YOUR CHILDREN WHEN BAKING COOKIES

CLINTON WINS ON BUDGET, BUT MORE LIES AHEAD

PLANE TOO CLOSE TO GROUND, CRASH PROBE TOLD

MINERS REFUSE TO WORK AFTER DEATH

JUNENILE COURT TO TRY SHOOTING DEFENDANT

STOLEN PAINTING FOUND BE TREE

TWO SISTERS REUNTIED AFTER 18 YEARS APART AT CHECKOUT COUNTER

WAR DIMS HOPE FOR PEACE

IF STRICKE ISN'T SETTLED QUICKLEY, IT MAY LAST A WHILE

COLD WAVE LINKED TO TEMPERATURES

ENFIELDS COUPLE SLAIN; POLICE SUSPECT HOMICIDE

RED TAPE HOLDS UP NEW BRIDGES

TYPHOON RIPS THROUGH CEMETARY; HUNDREDS DEAD

KIDS MAKE NUTRITIOUS SNAKES

NEW VACCINE MAY CONTAIN RABIES

MAN STRUCK BY LIGHTNING FACES BATTERY CHARGE

NEWPAPER HEADLINES WITH DOUBLE MEANINGS

MARCH PLANNED FOR NEXT AUGUST

LA VOTERS APPROVE URBAN RENEWAL BY LANDSLIDE

PATIENT AT DEATH'S DOOR-DOCTOR PULL HIM THROUGH

QUEEN MARY HAVING BOTTOM SCRAPED

KILLER SENTENCED TO DIE FOR SECOND TIME IN 10 YEARS

NEVER WITHHOLD HERPES INFECTION FROM LOVED ONES

;D ;D
Last edited by ChrisM on Thu Apr 07, 2005 1:58 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby Flt.Lt.Andrew » Thu Apr 07, 2005 3:38 am

LOL!!!

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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby the_autopilot » Thu Apr 07, 2005 3:48 am

LOL. Been posted before though

SOMETHING WENT WRONG IN JET CRASH, EXPERT SAYS


Bet that guy works for the FAA too.
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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby TacitBlue » Thu Apr 07, 2005 8:20 am

"Bicyclist, two children in hospital after belt accidents"

That was in my local paper a few months ago.
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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby beefhole » Thu Apr 07, 2005 8:29 pm

Never get tired of stupid newspaper titles :D
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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby Mobius » Thu Apr 07, 2005 8:39 pm

/\ /\ /\ agreed.  Can never get tired of those. :D
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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby TacitBlue » Thu Apr 07, 2005 9:33 pm

Holy crap! as I was reading this, a news lady came on TV and said "What educators want you to know about this butt crack, tonight at 10"
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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby ChrisM » Thu Apr 07, 2005 9:35 pm

Holy crap! as I was reading this, a news lady came on TV and said "What educators want you to know about this butt crack, tonight at 10"


lol ;D ;D
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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby Deputy » Fri Apr 08, 2005 2:22 am

No matter how many times this is posted, I still the the giggles whenever I see it.
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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby Romulus111VADT » Fri Apr 08, 2005 4:04 am

Our local news team anchorman made this ominous statement about the the stock market, "Today the stock market took a huge dump", he then proceeded to lose it as everyone cracked up. Cut to commercial.... ;D
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Re: Funny Newspaper Headlines

Postby TacitBlue » Fri Apr 08, 2005 8:49 am

I actually watched that news story that I mentioned. It turnes out that she actually said "What the schoolboard doesnt want you to know about this bus crash...", I guess thats what I get for trying to listen and read at the same time. ::)
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