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And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Thu Dec 16, 2004 3:32 am
by Deputy
1. Dogs come when you call them. Cats take a message to get back to you.
2. Dogs let you give them a bath and love you anyway.  Cats take out a contract on your life.
3. Dogs bark to wake you up if the house is on fire. Cats sneak out the back door.
4. Dogs bring you your slippers and the newspaper. Cats bring you a dead mouse.
5. Dogs play Frisbee with you all afternoon. Cats take a three-hour nap.
6. Dogs sit on the car seat next to you. Cats require a private box to go at all.
7. Dogs greet you and lick your face when you come home from work. Cats are mad that you  went.
8. Dogs sit, lie down, and heel on command. Cats smirk and walk away.
9. Dogs tilt their heads and listen whenever you talk. Cats yawn and close their eyes.
10. Dogs give you total love forever. Cats make you pay for every mistake you've ever made.


"If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer."
-- Alfred North Whitehead

Re: And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Thu Dec 16, 2004 3:11 pm
by Squeek
"If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer."
-- Alfred North Whitehead



i couldnt agree more. Especally with that part!

Re: And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Thu Dec 16, 2004 7:16 pm
by Jared
hmm...

seems to me all of those points lead me to the conclusion that cats could be considered management?

lol, just my take of it.. ;-)

Re: And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Fri Dec 17, 2004 3:27 am
by Skittles
I heard one thing about why cats are always trying to get ahead of their owners when going down stairs.

It's in the hopes that the owner will trip over them, fall down the stairs and die. That way the cat is rid of it's human captor.

My cat does this all the time.

Re: And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Fri Dec 17, 2004 3:45 am
by forfun
I know some people might take offence at this but i don't care. I HATE cats, this is a great thread.

The thing is, cats do their own thing, instead of being with you, they pi*s off all day till the food is ready.
My neighbours have a little cat called OSCAR. If i wasn't so bloody clumsy i woulda caught the b**tard and sent him away.

He constantly comes into my backyard!, one time there was a rug outside drying and i went outside to bring it back inside, and what had the cat done, it peed on the bloody thing. In fact, thats not the only thing it's peed on. Hammocks, matresses, sheets, washing.

It's a bloody nightmare.

So, i'm sitting here typing with the smell of cat pee filling my nose and i wonder how on earth someone could even touch those pests.

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer.

One of the greatest quotes in the world today

Re: And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Fri Dec 17, 2004 9:07 am
by Woodlouse2002
I heard one thing about why cats are always trying to get ahead of their owners when going down stairs.

It's in the hopes that the owner will trip over them, fall down the stairs and die. That way the cat is rid of it's human captor.

My cat does this all the time.

It's not trying to be rid of it's human captor. It's trying to get rid of that bloody human that has the nerve to live in it's house. If anything the cat's your captor.

Re: And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Fri Dec 17, 2004 8:26 pm
by Skittles
In fact, thats not the only thing it's peed on. Hammocks, matresses, sheets, washing.

It's a bloody nightmare.

So, i'm sitting here typing with the smell of cat pee filling my nose and i wonder how on earth someone could even touch those pests.
To prevent that problem, I had my cat's nuts cut.  And I'm not recommending you do that with your neighbors cat.

It's not trying to be rid of it's human captor. It's trying to get rid of that bloody human that has the nerve to live in it's house. If anything the cat's your captor.
You're absolutely right, I stand corrected.

Re: And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2004 11:18 pm
by cableguy
So that makes cats look like my girlfriend lol

Re: And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Mon Dec 20, 2004 5:02 am
by Politically Incorrect
If anything the cat's your captor.


Now I know why it is called a pussy(cat)  ;D ;D

Re: And you thought Dogs were dumb!

PostPosted: Mon Dec 20, 2004 1:15 pm
by Saitek
I take it the Dog society has reeked revenge on the Cat society! ;)

I love some dogs and hate some cats.
I love some cats and hate some dogs.
So one can either say I hate dogs and cats or that I love cats and dogs. ::)