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"A Treatise on the Importance of Smoke"      by Joseph Lucas


All electrical components and wiring harnesses depend on proper circuit
functioning, which is the transmission of charged ions by retention of the
visible spectral manifestation known as "smoke." Smoke is the thing that
makes electrical circuits work.  Don't be fooled by scientists and engineers
talking about excited electrons and the like.  Smoke is the key to all
things electrical.


We know this to be true because every time one lets the smoke out of an
electrical circuit, it stops working. This can be verified repeatedly
through empirical testing. For example, if one places a large copper bar
across the terminals of a battery, prodigious quantities of smoke are
liberated and the battery shortly ceases to function. In addition, if one
observes smoke escaping from an electrical component such as a Lucas voltage
regulator, it will also be observed that the component no longer functions.


The logic is elementary and inescapable!  The function of the wiring harness
is to conduct the smoke from one device to another. When the wiring harness
springs a leak and lets all the smoke out of the system, nothing works right
afterward.


Starter motors were considered unsuitable for British motorcycles for some
time largely because they regularly released large quantities of smoke from
the electrical system.


It has been reported that Lucas electrical components are possibly more
prone to electrical leakage than their Bosch, Japanese or American
counterparts. Experts point out that this is because Lucas is British, and
all things British leak. British engines leak oil, British shock absorbers,
hydraulic forks, and disk brake systems leak fluid, British tires leak air
and British Intelligence leaks national defense secrets.


Therefore, it follows that British electrical systems must leak smoke. Once
again, the logic is clear and inescapable.


Sometimes you may miss the component releasing the smoke that makes your
electrical system function correctly, but if you sniff around you can often
find the faulty component by the undeniable and telltale smoke smell.
Sometimes this is a better indicator than standard electrical tests
performed with a volt-ohm meter.


In conclusion, the basic concept of transmission of electrical energy in the
form of smoke provides a clear and logical explanation of the mysteries of
electrical components and why they fail.

Sounds about right. Good old Lucas.

Sometimes you may miss the component releasing the smoke that makes your
electrical system function correctly, but if you sniff around you can often
find the faulty component by the undeniable and telltale smoke smell.
Sometimes this is a better indicator than standard electrical tests
performed with a volt-ohm meter.

Some years ago my immediate boss was an X-licenced electrical engineer. We used to overhaul electrical components used on many GA aircraft. The first thing he used to do was to give them a hearty sniff. He reckoned the smell gave him a good idea of any problems to look out for.

I had a boss who loved to sneak stinking burntout electrical components into my office and deposit them in front of my desk where I couldn't see them.

He'd then go out shutting the door and wait outside timing how long I took to react.

I wouldn't want Joseph Lucas as my electrian.

lol, I put this in the back of my physics lab report book that I just finished making last night...

See if the prof gives me extra credit for it...:-)

I wouldn't want Joseph Lucas as my electrian.

Lucas electrics was a standing joke in the UK. Most British cars & motorcycles were fitted with Lucas products at one time. They had the reputation of being a tad unreliable.

Lucas Electric rewrites history...

Or... If Murphy had a real job it would be with Lucas Electric!

Nearly all the British cars imported were fitted with Lucas electrical system. Lucas has been coined The Prince of Darkness. Fittingly so! There you are out at about midnight with your favourite girl. The weather has been foul, the girl wants to go home, you are both soaked to the bone from the thunderstorm that came from nowhere. It is pitch black, the wipers are barely beating the rain off and all of a sudden DARKNESS. Lucas has struck! All the lights in the car go out the wipers stop. Dead, nada, zip. Not a blasted thing works. Sometimes the engine stays running, but most of the time it's dead as a doornail. Lucas strikes again!

Here's a few more comments.

[quote]Lucas Humor