Get boxes of condoms and put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10 minute intervals.
Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
Put M&M's on layaway.
Move "CAUTION-WET FLOOR" signs to carpeted areas.
When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask "Why won't you people leave me alone?"
Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission Impossible".
While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
Hide in the clothing rack, and when people browse through, whisper "Pick me, pick me."
When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO, NO....it's those voices again!"
Go to the fitting room and yell really loud..."Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"
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