Defence Attorney: What is your age? 
Little old Woman: I am 86 years old. 
Defence Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own  words, what happened 
to you? 
Little old Woman: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front 
porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping 
up on the porch and sat down beside me. 
Defence Attorney: Did you know him? 
Little old Woman: No, but he sure was friendly. 
Defence Attorney: What happened after he sat down? 
Little old Woman: He started to rub my thigh. 
Defence Attorney: Did you stop him? 
Little old Woman: No, I didn't stop him. 
Defence Attorney: Why not? 
Little old Woman: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Abner 
passed away some 30 years ago. 
Defence Attorney: What happened next? 
Little old Woman: He began to rub my breasts. 
Defence Attorney: Did you stop him then? 
Little old Woman: No, I did not stop him. 
Defence Attorney: Why not? 
Little old Woman: Why, Your Honour, his rubbing made me feel all alive 
and excited. I haven't felt that good in years! 
Defence Attorney: What happened next? 
Little old Woman: Well, I was feeling so spicy that I just laid down and 
said to him..."Take me ...young man...Take me!" 
Defence Attorney: Did he take you? 
Little old Woman: Hell, no. He just yelled, "April Fool!" ....And that's 
when I shot the little bastard!
			










