Pilot Rules
The only three things a wingman should ever say are:
1. Two's up.
2. Lead, you're on fire.
3. I'll take the fat chick.
and in a multi-place aircraft, there are only three things the copilot should ever say:
1. Nice landing, Sir.
2. I'll buy the first round.
3. I'll take the fat chick. As a new copilot on American Airlines, I was told to say these three things, and otherwise keep my mouth shut and not touch anything:
1. Clear on the right.
2. Outer (marker) on the double (indicator)
3. I'll eat the chicken. (Crew meals consisted of one steak and one chicken to avoid possible food poisoning of the cockpit crew).
About Pilots:
1. As an aviator in flight you can do anything you want... As long as it's right... And we'll let you know if it's right after you get down.
2. You can't fly forever without getting killed.
3. As a pilot only two bad things can happen to you and one of them will. a. One day you will walk out to the aircraft knowing that it is your last flight in an airplane.. b. One day you will walk out to the airplane not knowing that it is your last flight in an airplane..
4. Any flight over water in a single engine airplane will absolutely guarantee abnormal engine noises and vibrations.
5. There are Rules and there are Laws. The rules are made by men who think that they know better how to fly your airplane than you. The Laws (of Physics) were made by the Great One. You can, and sometimes should, suspend the Rules but you can never suspend the Laws.
6. More about Rules: a. The rules are a good place to hide if you don't have a better idea and the talent to execute it. b. If you deviate from a rule, it must be a flawless performance. (e.g., If you fly under a bridge, don't hit the bridge.)
7. The pilot is the highest form of life on earth.
8. The ideal pilot is the perfect blend of discipline and aggressiveness.
.and wish.
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