The Boss is an Aviation Junkie, too.... These are from him; :D
Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!"
Delta 351: "Give us another hint! We have digital watches!"
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One day, the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold
short of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed,
rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee.
Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and
said, "What a cute little plane. Did you make it all by yourself?"
The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back
with a real zinger: "I made it out of DC-8 parts. Another landing
like yours and I'll have enough parts for another one."
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There's a story about the military pilot calling for a priority
landing, because his single-engine jet fighter was running "a bit
peaked".
Air Traffic Control told the fighter jock that he was number two,
behind a B-52 that had one engine shut down.
"Ah", the fighter pilot remarked, " The dreaded Seven-engine
approach". -------
A student became lost during a solo cross-country flight.
While attempting to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked, "What
was your last known position?"
Student: "When I was number one for takeoff".
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Taxiing down the tarmac, the DC10 abruptly stopped, turned around
and returned to the gate. After an hour-long wait, it finally took
off.
A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, "What, exactly,
was the problem?" "The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in
the engine," explained the flight attendant. "It took us a while
to find a new pilot."
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"TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees.."
"Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up
here?"
"Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a
727?"
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