I second PT's remarks. really funny stuff. I especially like the first one.
Hawkeye
An Aircraft Mechanic only needs two tools, Duct Tape and WD40. If it moves and it's not supposed to - use the Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and it's supposed to - use the WD40.
Intel(R) i5 CPU 750 @ 2.67GHz, P55M-UD4, GeForce GTX960 8.00 GB RAM, Windows 7 Ultimate (32 bit & 64 bit on separate HDs)
Win 8.1 64-bit. DX11. Advent Tower. Intel i7-3770 3.9 GHz 8-core. 8 GB System RAM. AMD Radeon HD 7700 1GB RAM. DVD ROM. 2 Terra Byte SATA Hard Drive. Philips 17" LCD Monitor. Saitek Cyborg X Fly-5 Joystick. ...and a Briggs and Stratton Petrol Lawn Mower.
Back in '72 I spotted a bumper sticker in a 7-11 just before the presidential election. Unfortunately, it didn't occur to me to actually buy it. It was the Nixon vs McGovern election year:
A caricature of Richard Nixon, and beneath it: "You can't beat our Dick for President."
I had a good buddy that made his own bumper sticker and it read: D.A.M.M. drunks against mad mothers. Even the highway patrol thought that was hilarious as they were under pressure from the opposing forces constantly.