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Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 2:51 am
by ozzy72
As US coast-to-coast crimewaves go, it is not in the league of Bonnie and Clyde. It lacks both violence and avarice and is further hindered by an overabundance of pre-publicity.
Undeterred, a couple of students from Cornwall are intent on making American criminal history by spending their summer breaking as many US laws as possible.
Starting in the liberal state of California, they hope to evade the attention of local police officers when they ride a bike in a swimming pool and curse on a crazy-golf course.
In the far more conservative - and landlocked - state of Utah, they will risk the penitentiary when they hire a boat and attempt to go whale-hunting.
If they manage to outwit state troopers in Utah, and perhaps federal agents on their trail, they will be able to take a deserved, but nevertheless illegal, rest when they have a nap in a cheese factory in South Dakota.
"There are thousands of stupid laws in the United States, but we are limiting ourselves to breaking about 45 of them," said Richard Smith, from Portreath, Cornwall.
The journey, which appropriately enough begins in Alcatraz, will cover around 18,000 miles and take eight weeks - provided, of course, that Mr Smith and his accomplice, Luke Bateman, are not apprehended along the way.
Mr Smith got the idea for his transatlantic crime wave while playing a board game called Balderdash with his 12-year-old neighbour. One of the game's questions asks players to complete the phrase: "It is illegal in Florida for a widow to ... "
The answer is to parachute on a Sunday. However, as he is not female and has not lost a husband, Mr Smith will be un able to pay homage to his inspiration. Still, there are many more laws to choose from.
"I looked on various websites, one in particular called dumblaws.com, and found loads of stupid laws. Some of them there are outmoded reasons for, others just seem to be ridiculous, like banning whale-hunting in a landlocked state," he said.
Mr Smith has made some preparations for his criminality - although he thinks the cheese factory owner in South Dakota wasn't taking him entirely seriously - but in other states he admits there will be difficulties in transgressing the law.
"Driving round the town square 100 times in Oxford, Mississippi, is going to take for ever because there are no roundabouts," he said. "And I'm rubbish at walking on my hands so crossing the street in Hartford, Connecticut, while walking on them is going to be very difficult."
He is attempting to negotiate a book deal, which could help pay any fines he incurs.

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 5:04 am
by eno
This wouldn't be Woodlouse would it?? ;D ;D

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 5:13 am
by Hagar
This wouldn't be Woodlouse would it?? ;D ;D

Well, he did mention going away for the summer. He kept quiet about his destination. :D

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 6:58 am
by ATI_7500
Best idea of all times! Those guys deserve a nobel prize!  :o

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 8:16 am
by Woodlouse2002
Alas it is not me. Nor anyone I know for that matter. Tis a good idea though. ;D

I just hope they have really strong cornish accents to really confuse the police. ;D

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 8:23 am
by Fozzer
...Love it...!

Ozzy, you really should publish the source, (Web Site), of your amazing information...!

..then, perhaps, we could add to it... ;)...!

I'm up for breaking California State laws on speed limits on Route 101, on my motor-bike, for a start... 8)...!
Tee-Hee...!

Paul.

P.S. I think Woody would be in favour of infringing New Yorks laws by paddling his coracle around the Statue of Liberty....without permission... ;)... ;D....!

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 2:46 pm
by ozzy72
Most of my funny stories appear in either the Guardian Online, or BBC News. Both excellent places to read (online) about the world, and find funny stories ;D

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 6:43 pm
by Woodlouse2002

P.S. I think Woody would be in favour of infringing New Yorks laws by paddling his coracle around the Statue of Liberty....without permission... ;)... ;D....!




You mean there's a law against that too!!!!!!

Fozzer, one day in the not to distant future, you shall hear of me.... Now how do I get a coracle through customs..... 8)

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 6:47 pm
by Smoke2much
Buy one when you get there Woody.  There's a coracle shop on 54th street.

Will

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 7:28 pm
by Hagar
While you're about it Woody you can find a puddle in Utah & go whale-hunting. Might as well make the trip worthwhile.

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 8:37 pm
by xFLAMESx
While you're about it Woody you can find a puddle in Utah & go whale-hunting. Might as well make the trip worthwhile.

;D That one got me too :-/
No offence, but only in America ;) ;D

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 9:53 pm
by legoalex2000
i'll just go along and chain wheelbarrows to tress here in Des Plaines, IL and attempt to sell them. just to see the cops reactions.

it's gonna be hard, since 1/3 of Des Plaines is Cook County Forest Preserve

PS. yes, if you saw blues brothers, I do live in Cook County, and I live next to Mount Prospect (fun town in the summer)

anyway, and wheelbarrow donations would be appreciated.

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sun Feb 27, 2005 4:55 am
by eno
This one is my personal favourite.
In Lexington Kentucky

By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."

/me floats out of the local pub every friday night ......

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sun Feb 27, 2005 10:01 am
by Woodlouse2002
While you're about it Woody you can find a puddle in Utah & go whale-hunting. Might as well make the trip worthwhile.

Across America with a coracle eh? Could be written up into a bestseller. ;D

Re: Cornish nutters in the US

PostPosted: Sun Feb 27, 2005 10:31 am
by Fozzer
Across America with a coracle eh? Could be written up into a bestseller. ;D


New York Times:
Newsflash...
Cornish-man from England booked for exceeding the speed limit on Route 66 in a wicker coracle.
NYPD spokesman says "Crazy Englishmen should not be allowed to infringe our countries laws".
Michael Jackson freed on appeal.
Todays weather: Naff. As usual.


Paul...get all your latest U.S. news here...